There’s a well known saying “Pay yourself first.” What exactly does this mean? Aside from some of the obvious interpretations such as creating a healthy savings account or setting up a 401k, what else could this mean? Is there something more important to be gleaned? Personally, I think there is. “Pay yourself first” is a great way of saying “put yourself first.” It seems simple enough, but the majority of folks I know simply don’t do it.
I like to think of this concept like an empty glass. The glass represents you and it’s of no real value when it’s empty. In order to be of any value to those around you, you need to fill up that glass. How? Well – it means different things to different people. For me, it can be as simple as taking a drive on a nice day with the windows down and the music loud. It might mean making better food choices, reading one book each month, beginning a journal, having a date night each week, or simply scheduling a standing mani / pedi appointment. As you do something for yourself, your glass gets fuller. My mom would describe this as your “love tank”. In order to love others, you must love yourself first. Therefore, you have to keep your “love tank” full. Each time you do something for others, a little goes out of your love tank, so you have to keep filling it up each day by doing something for yourself. This can be as simple as appreciating the stillness of the early morning. It doesn’t have to be elaborate, but it must be deliberate.
Appreciate beauty wherever you see it
The best part about this, is that as you pay yourself first, you’ll find that you have so much more to offer the world. You’ll be happier, more energized, and more confident. I mentioned in a previous post about the importance of being a witness for love. That’s one of my favorite concepts. There are examples of love everywhere – simply by becoming aware of what’s already going on around you, your tank will be overflowing. You will simply radiate with love and the idea of paying yourself first will become a non-issue because you’ll do it naturally. Stopping to express gratitude for each small example of kindness will usher in new ways to express kindness to others. Remember that insurance commercial where someone picked up a child’s dropped toy? Someone else witnessed that and did something kind for someone else, and the pattern continued. Some call this practicing random acts of kindness. This isn’t a new concept. But it’s an important one.
So – pay yourself first, be a witness for good, and then watch as your daily experience is transformed. It’s important to focus only on the good, but may not always be an easy thing to disregard the not-so-good. The trick is to amplify the good to the point that the rest simply falls away. It ceases to be about ignoring the bad, and it becomes a fun game of “How much good can I witness today?”.
It’s okay to put yourself first. In fact, I’d venture to say that it’s imperative that you do. You’ll be more valuable to yourself and your loved ones as you embrace this challenge. Be sure your love tank is full, each and every day.
